Ask a car enthusiast what their ideal number of cars is, and the answer will probably be n+1. In this case, n means the number of cars they currently own, and +1 means, well, plus one. It’s not so much about hoarding, it’s about enjoying a larger breadth of automotive experiences, and sometimes having backups for the cars you already own. Oh, and what makes getting another car better? Not paying a dime for it.
The free car is often a fantasy, but real free cars are rarely perfect. After all, if you get known for an eclectic mix of older cars, chances are the cars you attract will be less-than-perfect. The question is: How far is too far? How bad does a free car have to be for you to say no?
When it comes to additional cars, I have limitations. My indoor storage and wrenching area is full of Porsches, and since it’s snow season in Toronto, any car I acquire must run and drive. Beyond that, I usually don’t want anything that’s rotted out. I mean, I don’t have 240-volt service in my garage, and although I technically can stick metal together with a 120-volt flux core welder, it’s going to be ugly. Fine for floor pans, but all the slag and spatter will require grinding if used on an A-surface. Oh yeah, and the factory emissions equipment needs to work fine because catalytic converters are bloody expensive and all the hardware just fuses together after several salt belt winters.
Then again, we are talking about a free car here, so I’m generally fairly open. If it doesn’t pique my interest, I can always register it, drive it for a week to see what it’s about, and sell it. Worst case, it’s so bad, it needs to be scrapped. Best case, someone gets a decent car for bottom-of-the-market pricing.
Plus, rules are sometimes made to be broken. If someone gave me a field-find DeTomaso Pantera, air-cooled Porsche, Honda S600, TVR Griffith, or something that just really gets my desire pumping with an engine that isn’t locked up, I don’t know if I’d be able to say no. Occasionally, the heart simply overrules the head, and we do things not because they’re easy, but because we thought they’d be easy. Similarly, if someone offers me a free parts car for a car I already own, and said parts car has rare stuff I want on it, I’m booking a U-Haul faster than you can order Domino’s.
So, how bad does a free car have to be for you to say no?
Top graphic image: David Tracy
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